{why.long.car.trips.don't.work.for.me}

So, here we are, back to life at the Powell home, and I can resist sharing with you how our car ride went on the way home (and how it usually goes). You would think that with these brilliant DVD players, everyone would be entertained. Everyone would be happy. Everyone would let me ride in peace, except for the "My Little Pony" theme song blaring in my ear because, apparently, both of the girls are going deaf at any early age. BUT, throw sweet Addy into the mix and what should go as planned, usually doesn't. Let me break it down for you.

We ate at Pizza Inn following church on Sunday, with the hopes of full tummies (um, have you tried their chocolate chip pizza . . . ridiculously good), which should translate into happy girls on the way home. We pull out of Pizza Inn at 12:15.

12:16

(Addy)"Are we dere, mommy?"

(Me) "No, Addy. Remember, it's a long ride home from Grammy's."

(Addy) "OK, Mommy."

12:22

(Addy) "I ready to be home."

(Me) "Me too, Addy. We'll be there in a while."

(Addy) "OK, Mommy."

12:27

(Addy) "Are we dere yet, mommy?"

(Me) "No, Addy. It's a long, long, long ride, remember?"

(Addy) "OK, Mommy."

12:32

(Addy) "I ready to be home."

(Me) "I'm trying to get us there as fast as I can without getting in trouble."

(Addy) Silence. For sure, I could go faster, right?

12:33

(Addy) "I want some "fute" snacks."

(Me) "I don't have any, Addy. I'm sorry."

(Addy) "YOU CHECK. LOOK IN MY BAG."

(Me) "There isn't any in your bag."

(Addy) "What do you have?" (As if I have brought all of the Wal-Mart snack aisle with me.)

(Me) "How about some Dora animal crackers that Daniel gave us?"

(Addy) "OK. I hold the bag."

(Me - speaking to myself) "I don't care if she eats the whole bag. At least her mouth will be busy. Please, child. I'm about to go insane, and we haven't even gotten on 385 yet."

12:35

(Addy) "I all done, mommy. Are we dere?"

(Me) "No, Addy. We're still a LONG way away."

(Addy, crying) "But I want to get out."

(Me) "Sorry. You can't get out right now."

(Addy) More crying.

12:38

(Addy) "I need a snack."

(Me) "How about some craisons?"

(Addy) "I hold the bag."

(Me) "Super." (Can you see my words dripping with sarcasm? I realize that Craisons are a fiber rich food that could have some serious repercussions, but at the moment, I don't care.)

12:40

(Addy) "I all done. HERE YA GO."

(Me) "OK." As I swerve to grab the Craisons bag.

(Addy) "Are we dere now."

(Me) Silence. Deadly silence. Praying Addy will fall asleep.

And so our car ride goes. Just like that, subbing in every single snack that I brought. I want to scream. I want to throw myself out of the car. I want to make enough money to buy a private jet that only holds one person and the pilot.

This is why long car rides don't work for me.

I promise wedding pictures are coming. These weddings are hard work!